How to Deal with a Narcissist During a Child Custody Case

Going through a divorce is never easy on the parents. It can even be more challenging if there were some violence and children involved because the parents will also have to go through a custody battle. Custody battles can be challenging if you are dealing with a narcissist. You will want to protect yourself and your children from them. 

People who have Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) have arrogant thinking and self-centered behavior. They lack empathy and often tend to think that they can get away with anything. They have an excessive need for admiration, and are manipulative, and demanding, which makes them very difficult to deal with. 

A parent with NPD can negatively impact their children. Luckily, there are experts familiar with child custody mediation when one parent is a narcissist and can help you win such battles. Here is what you need to do when dealing with a narcissist during a child custody case.

Hire an Experienced Family Lawyer

When dealing with a narcissist, you are likely to face emotional manipulation, personal attacks, and lies. This is because narcissists believe that they are not the problem, but the other person is. Therefore, they will try to portray you as a bad parent. In such cases, the stakes are very high; it is all about your children. For their sake of them, you will want to ensure that they do not end up being raised by a narcissistic parent. According to the law, child custody after a divorce is decided according to the child’s best interest. You do not have an automatic preference.

To prove that it is in your child’s best interest for you to have custody, you will need the help of an experienced family lawyer. Hire a lawyer you are comfortable with, and you can trust to walk the journey with you. You need a lawyer from firms like Peters and May (petersmay.com); a lawyer who handles such cases on a daily basis and can counter any bad-faith arguments the opposing party might try to make. Your lawyer will also give you expert advice on what to expect and how to handle the case. Remember, losing the custody battle to a narcissistic partner can be disastrous for your children.

Gather Good Documentation and Evidence

When you are in a battle with a narcissist, the judge, jury, and any other person may not see you the way you see yourself because the narcissist partner would have managed to portray you in a bad light. You will need to have hard evidence to support your case.

The court has a responsibility to look at all sides equally regardless of what the other party says about them. To help your case, have documents such as medical records and police reports showing domestic violence, a journal on any form of abuse or altercation with you or the children. The court may also look at the parents’ wishes concerning the children, their financial or physical ability, and psychological and medical health. 

Come Up with a Good Strategy

Once you hire a lawyer, they will sit down with you, review the case, and develop a winning strategy. Custody cases end up with either joint or full custody. Your strategy should all be about your kids’ well-being, and, in such cases, you may want to file for full custody. You will need to show the court that you are protecting your kids and not punishing your partner. This stance will avoid dragging your children into your battle. 

Narcissists can always try to undermine someone and also get under their skin. They will want to get you angry, and the court can misinterpret your outburst. Therefore, stay calm even if they do not. The judge and jury will be watching the two of you very closely. Do not let anything get to you.

Talk to a Custody Mediation Lawyer 

Dealing with a narcissist while fighting for the custody of your children is not easy. You will need to have an expert by your side to advise and fight for you and the children. One of the strategies to fight them is to understand who they are, stay calm, and follow your lawyer’s advice.


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